Onward to the next thing

I’ve never felt more definitively “between projects” than I do right now. I mean for the first time in three years I’m neither under contract nor am I currently working on a manuscript. I do have ten thousand words of a literary novel for adults that I’m pretty stoked on, and I think I’ll get back to that later in the summer. But in the meantime there are a few things I’ve wanted to try. I don’t know. These are exciting times. It’s still amazing to me sometimes that I’ve actually written novels. Like these whole huge long things. I’ve written them. One even got published! And didn’t do too poorly either. What a weird, weird thing. I still feel like a total beginner / outsider. Maybe this is what imposter syndrome feels like. I’ve never thought that I suffered from it, but perhaps I do.

And yet I don’t know. Part of it is that I still don’t feel fully grown up or mature or anything like that. I mean I do in my life. In my life I’ve pretty much got everything under control. But in my writing I still feel like I haven’t taken control of my full power. Not exactly sure where or how to do that…but I guess you just have to keep trying.